Once upon a time, there was a woman who was very, very good at working with her hands and her mind. She wasn't very good at math, and once in college she overdrew her account and ended up with something like 500$ in fees. It's not that the math is too hard- it's just frustrating and time consuming, so she prefers to not do it. When she does do math, the numbers jump around and don't follow the rules, subtractions coming out greater than the initial number, things that all should end in zeros ending in 39.45s, and decimal places swapping locations like a bunch of young kids playing musical chairs.
For some years after her college overdraw, she was pretty careful to stay within a mental limit of allowable spending, dependent on the paycheck. It's not as hard to keep track of paper money as it is plastic, so paper money was her favorite method of paying for things.
Fast forward a couple years and this woman has married a man who can make math jump through hoops, line up single file, and quietly wait their turns to be computed. Relieved, she turns over all responsibility for everyday math to him. Her paychecks get signed over to him, and he sorts out when rent is payed, and how much electricity really is this month, and how much they should spend on groceries. While money is always tight, everything runs well and all are happy in the land. Plastic begins to creep back into the picture as the tips from working in restaurant culture fade like the horrible memories of working in the restaurant.
A few more years into the future, life is grand. The apartment is swell, the food is fabulous and organic, the treats are many, and the dinners out are fabulous. The woman gets an allowance, but sometimes asks if it's affordable for special treats. The man almost never says no, and the general impression is that if the woman and the man were much like Scrooge Mcduck in form and animation, they would be swimming in a pool of dollar coins, compared to many of their same age friends. The months go by, and the woman is in medical school. Eating out is more common, as study groups often require the purchase of a coffee or something to remain at a public place, since everybody is too busy studying to clean their homes. The woman runs in to a lot of health problems, even to the point of emergency surgery and check ups every single week. The cats that the pair own get worms and require medication. The best potato-fry cooking pan breaks into three pieces. The weeks are busier, and gas is more expensive. The apartment raises the rent by almost 100$, but the woman talks them into only raising the rent 75$, which is still a lot of money. Friends get married, and need gifts for ceremonies and bridal showers. All throughout, the impression is that the money is fine and scrooge mcduck is still swimming.
Then one day, the woman goes for a dive in the pool of luxury and hits her nose on the bottom of the mysteriously empty pool. Upon realizing that all is not right with the world, the man and the woman sit down and work out the budget as it currently stands, and find that the amount of money that they're spending is about 300$ more than they're earning a month. Their savings are almost gone. A ticket arrives in the mail. And suddenly, all of the illusions about how well they were doing shattered.
They puzzled and moaned and pounded out a new budget. They found a way to pay all the bills and still save 50$ a month, and still go on a date once a month, but the frills that had seemed so commonplace were chopped up and squeezed for pennies.
The moral of the story is- you can't ignore a facet of life that is a joint effort.
Both spouses really need to know how much money is coming in, and how much money is going out. You can't be indulgent because your spouse likes nice things, and you can't not do math because you don't like doing it. You can't eat organic food simply because you want to.
And my real take home lessons-
No comments:
Post a Comment